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WORDS HAVE POWER!

So, this week’s newsletter is a little different as I want to talk about the power of our words and the weight that they hold. I have been struck several times in the last few days, by how our words can directly affect us physically and mentally. I am hoping that by sharing my experiences it will bring you hope, encouragement and a challenge to change some of the things that you speak over yourself and how you value you.

If we speak over ourselves negativity, defeat that is what we will reap. On the flip side if we speak positivity and victory that is what we will reap! Whatever battle or storm we face or are currently in, what we speak into it can change the situation. We can recognise a negative statement and chose to reframe it, taking its power away.

A good friend once told me when I was worried about a race, that it could be hard, but I had to choose to not be weak! Trust me that wasn’t easy when halfway through a half marathon I was done, but that little voice in my head, kept telling me I wasn’t weak, that I had it, that I could do it, contrary to how my body felt. It’s amazing the power that the voice in your head has, it can be the difference between bailing or finish strong!

Driving into work today I was having my own personal battle, as race season for me starts again on Sunday and I have been struggling in my head over the run leg of the triathlon. I have been worrying about it, convincing myself that at mile 4 I will lose it and instead of seeing me smashing it out of the park, I have seen me failing. In that moment I had a stern word with myself and actively chose to change my self -talk; declaring that I am strong, powerful, successful and that I have this!

Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t an easy decision and even as I type this, I am consciously making myself change my self-talk! To practice what I have been preaching to people about this week and actively batting off the negative voices. I get to choose which voice I listen to and as hard as it is I am challenging myself to engage my brain and speak positivity!

So here is a little insight into my week and why I am so passionate about the POWER OF WORDS! It started with Run Norwich, a 10km race that attracts 8500 people. Easy, you may think, but this race wasn’t about me and a time, it was about something far more important, getting my run buddy around in one piece and with a smile on her face.

She hasn’t run more than 3.5 miles in two years, due to her own personal mental health battles and is battling the demons in her own head as running used to be her therapy, but in recent months that hasn’t been the case. She chose to challenge herself and go for it, a flipping brave thing to do and I was her wing woman. Together we smashed it, completed it in the time she wanted and when the head started to go, we took a moment to pause and change the dialogue in her head, from, ‘ I can’t’, to ‘I can’, from, ‘I am failing’ to ‘I have this’! Sometimes we all need a wing person that can help us change our declaration.

Following this, on Monday I met two different people at my studio. One was a potential new client and the other someone I trained for several years, but post having a baby has had to stop for financial reasons, but also like me is an anorexic who is in recovery.

Both entered the building with their own anxieties and struggles. The first had taken months to get in contact, as they were so anxious and overwhelmed, having found themselves isolated through circumstances out of their control. Together we talked it through and focused on the positives, on the first steps of the journey to reclaim their own body back and about taking control, setting aside time for themselves to work on improving their self-esteem.

The second person and I had a long chat about how we personally deal with life on a day-to-day basis and the decisions that we make to stay well. For both of us, our triggers are similar, when things are out of control or struggles hit the first thing, we try to control is food. We understand that restricting food isn’t the solution, but it’s imbedded in our brains that it is.

The question is, how do we stop ourselves going down a slippery path?

Thankfully we both have awesome support crews, that understand us. They know commenting on what we are eating or about how we need to look after our bodies isn’t going to work. If they tell us we look well, they know what we hear is, ‘you are fat’, if they push too hard, they know we will shut down. Instead, they speak encouraging words, listen to us and help us cope in a healthy way. Their words bring hope and life and prevent us going down a path of self-destruction.

In conjunction with this, Sarah and I have had a lot going on and are both going through a process of change. As part of this, we are both becoming increasingly aware of the power that words hold over us and over many of our clients. It’s so easy to get caught up in a cycle of negative thinking, especially when you are tired and working long hours. We notice when on a low ebb, we fall into the trap of negative self – talk and must challenge each other to change what we say.

Our jobs are people facing and in that role it’s easy to get so wrapped up in others and their needs that we forget our own. This is a lesson we are learning and are on a journey of trying to change this. To assess how we are doing and amid the storm to ground ourselves and speak truth. As Christians, we constantly remind each other that we are fearfully and wonderfully made and speak hope as an act of will, even when we don’t feel like it.

Then we get to today and a discussion with one of my clients about the power of words and the use of negative and positive in reference to them. She is trained in NLP techniques and works with people to help them change their behaviour and thought patterns.

The bottom line is we all have negative thoughts at times and statements about ourselves, but how do we reframe these? Firstly in speaking them out loud they lose their power and in that moment you can re frame them. For example, instead of saying ‘I can’t do this’, we can say ‘I can try my best to do this’. In changing the words, we shift our thinking and our outlook on a situation.

She also came out with something that challenged me, especially as I enter race season again and I fight the racing demons and imposter syndrome. That it’s important to acknowledge that we are not our thoughts, therefore we cannot be them. Every day we all have an internal dialogue that we don’t even recognise or challenge, instead we take them as fact.

So for example, we may internally tell ourselves that,’ we are crap, fed up etc. However, by reframing the word into the third person and instead saying, ‘I am doing crap today, I am doing fed up today’, it alters the impact on us. Instead of it having a hold over us for time, it becomes something that is just for that moment and gives us the ability to move past that moment and change it. Tomorrow could be a day where, ‘we are doing good’, as yesterday’s thought has gone!

So, my challenge to you this week is this ….

What do you need to change this week to make sure you succeed?

What self-talk do you need to alter to succeed?

Personally, I am choosing to believe in myself and encourage myself that I am a good triathlete, that I can run fast and that I am worth eating properly.

GO AND GET THIS NEXT WEEK AND KNOW YOU GOT THIS!